Friday, December 22, 2006

Sun, 17 Dec - A Wet Weekend (and an even wetter Week)

Today it just rained the whole day. It was overcast in the morning but we thought it might still be possible to sneak in a visit to Botanic Gardens. But just as I was packing for the outing, it started to rain, and it didn't stop. In fact it continued on Monday and Tuesday, wreaking great havoc all over Singapore! My maid requested a full-day off today and my in-laws were coming to our place today. TT had arranged to play mahjong with his mother as she was pretty bored. The rain was really bad over these few days, my yard and our corridor was always wet because the wind was also blowing in our direction. We only managed to play two rounds (winds) of mahjong. It's almost impossible to have an uninterrupted game with our two kids around, and what's more we were maidless today.

This wet weather was also making me rather blue these few days. I have alot on my mind lately: my work, my hubby & kids, housing, primary school for my daughter, personal fulfilment and dreams, career satisfaction, finances and estate planning, etc. Not problems per se, but decisions I have to or yet to make. I just wish I had more time, but then it would never be enough. I wish I had more resolve, but I am a master of procrastination! I wish I could sleep less, but my body thinks otherwise. Sometimes I wish I could spend more time with my kids instead of being at work, but I don't think I have the temperament nor aptitude to be a full-time mum. Can we afford it? I have many personal dreams I wish to pursue but cannot. If I were to die tomorrow, will I have regrets? I have so much to do and feel so unfulfilled. Sometimes I wish I had one day to do nothing and just waste time lazing around at the beach while time for the rest of the world stands still...

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